As always, this publication will provide live coverage of the National Broadcasting Company's telecast of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
0906 - The Spirit of America Dance Team is pink. Yikes. It looks like a Susan G. Komen rally. They must be a Texas thing. Oh, there goes the obligatory R&B dance number, for which women in cowgirl outfits are spectacularly unsuited. At least they've got Charlie Daniels' "The Devil Went Down to Georgia".
0912 - Oh, a calliope in the background of this NBC promo for something called The Event. We don't see enough of those things.
0913 - I can't get excited about Memphis; nothing seems to attract me about it. Sorry. The lyrics of this song are banal; the rock and roll of your soul? Please.
0922 - Breakfast; sorry about that, Green Day. Having to explain American Idiot to family is not something I'm particularly interested in. I would rather have seen the Disney steamboat than Terrence Howard, but oh well.
Wow, it's the Tommy Westphal universe, courtesy of Coca-Cola. Nifty commercial.
0926 - Roker, stop interfering with the musicians.
0927 - Million Dollar Quartet sounds like something I'd want to see. Elvis looks like John Cusack. Is that supposed to be Buddy Holly on the drums? Nobody in the room can figure out who the woman is supposed to be, and the bass player is totally anonymous, but so far this segment s the hit of the broadcast. Jerry Lee Lewis isn't bad, either. That was worthy of applause.
0932 - Scrabble Flash looks like an interesting game. Our local NBC affiliate's commercial is slick. Meanwhile, I can't get excited about diamonds. If that old Atlantic article is still true, they're worse investments than Goldline.
Since I don't watch NBC, The Sing-Off is essentially dead air. I do, however, have respect for a cappella performances.
0938 - Yawn, Roker and another NBC actor.
0940 - Yawn, Twilight. Kristen Stewart isn't hideous.
Is this Summer Glau? Well, it is. She's overrated but hey, she's a terminator. I haven't any idea of what the series is about so the actual interview is somewhat lost on me. If Keith David is in it, that can't be too bad. Well, yee haw, an Australian says we know how to throw a party. What a compliment.
0945 - Ah, Elf. I think that's where I first heard of Zooey Deschanel. That's enough to overwhelm the annoying Will Ferrell. One of the dancers has a visibly shorter skirt, so I suppose we're intended to watch her. The song itself isn't entirely bad and the big black dude's little part was good. He's appropriately hammy, so this wasn't bad. Hey, it's Juan Valdez!
0949 - Dear George Lopez, when you ask me for money, do it in English.
0952 - Hooray, the Rockettes. Here's what I'm interested in. This year's costume looks like a North Pole barber's pole or something similar; it works. Talk about beauty and precision! One wonders what level of training and practice is necessary to get that down pat. Y'know, we could watch them for a while.
0958 - The Purdue Boilermakers aren't playing anything I recognize, but we're glad to see them, though. Confetti cannons herald the arrival of the NYPD, so here goes the official arrival of the parade.
This is Robin Hall's tenth and final time leading the parade, with a World War I flying ace bringing up the rear. A Peanuts float follows, and I don't know what Woodstock's signal flags say. There's the Tom Turkey float, "desperately hoping not to be a statistic". Alton Brown rides on this while some guy I've never heard of sings. Apparently, the Food Network has sponsored the float itself. The Macy's belief meter is about three-quarters of the way to full.
1006 - The creatures on the Ocean Spray float are creepy. Sandra Lee is somewhat attractive and Arlo Guthrie is old. A member of the audience observed that he sounded like Bob Dylan. Indeed. Was that Jennifer Love Hewitt with him?
Ah, here's Kermit the Frog, with a mention of Amy Adams. Hooray?
1010 - The Blue Springs High School (Missouri) Golden Regiment Marching Band's "North African?!"-inspired Bacchanal. Half of these kids had never flown, and so what, Meredith? Not everyone is like you. I don't know what North Africa has to do with Thanksgiving, but I did like the piece.
Sesame Street's float is here. Wow, one of those guys looks like he should be seeking a warm throat full of pulsing blood as he ventures forth from his crypt. He's also the only one I recognize. I have no idea if we all have music deep inside, but whatever.
1012 - Never heard of this next character, something about a diary and a wimpy kid.
1014 - Sorry, Microsoft. Your Kinect ad fails to connect. Meanwhile, Peggy is a good Discover ad. Ocean Spray's ad is good; nobody can tell dates and figs apart anyways. The Windows Phone ad fails. A bunny to Blur's song 2; er, what? Called "Hop" from Universal Studios.
1016 - Oh, this is nice. Got to like
1018 - Waukesha North High School's (Wisconsin) Northstar Marching Band has something called "American Fanfare". Home of Trains magazine and I can't hear them clearly. They have swords, which is nice. It's not a memorable tune, but I did like their performance.
1019 - Jimmy Fallon rides aboard the Macy's Golden Eagle Express, a weirdly-proportioned replica of a 4-4-0 American locomotive. To answer your question, I'm sure that the Christian children of Africa have an idea that it's Christmastime. As for the Muslim or miscellaneous, who knows?
1022 - The Mount Rushmore float is great. Here's Chip Davis and Mannheim Steamroller, a modern Christmas tradition. Too bad they didn't give this band time to actually play.
1026 - The Statue of Liberty float is cluttered by something from a movie I didn't see. Here's Southern Mississippi's marching band playing "Get Happy". Can't remember who made that tune famous. They were on the bounce getting into the performance area and they've now moved on.
The Marion Carole steamboat from Macy's is nice, but we got seconds to look at it. Bother!
1030 - The Pizza Team is weird but this is impressive. I wasn't aware that pizza crust dough was that cooperative.
1033 - Ashton Kutcher is not a serious photographer and I've got a sneaking sensation that our current Miss USA or Miss America, whatever, is a sign of national decline.
1035 - Whoever this bunch is, they're a Technicolor nightmare on my HD television. They're pitching folks around with aplomb, but the quick cuts on the music aren't attractive. The Beach Boys don't mix well with mid-1990s quasi-hip-hop.
1036 - The Seminole High School (Florida) marching band is weirdly muted. One wonders if Macy's looks for frenetic action as opposed to musical talent.
1038 - Spongebob Squarepants, yawn.
1039 - Juanes, yawn. I'd rather see the Victoria's Secret ad again, but why bother having Katy Perry and some guy named Akon (What, couldn't spell Akron?) along? I don't imagine anyone watches that for the music. Meanwhile, the Jolly Polly is fun to see. Why are we wasting time with a Latino foreign national singing in Spanish on an American holiday broadcast?
1041 - Ooh, a Yogi Bear movie. Something looks wrong about that.
1043 - Memo to Kim Kardashian: Those aren't misconceptions; you're simply trash.
1044 - The Oneida nations' float is nice. I've never heard of Crystal Shawanda, but whatever. Inasmuch as Indians did have a hand in the Thanksgiving event, might as well let them have a place in the
Wait, what's a rocking turtle?
I missed the name of the next band, Lassiter High from Marietta, Georgia. They're doing a Black-Eyed Peas medley, yawn. The color scheme on their flag corps is nice but I don't know enough BEP to comment beyond that.
Louis the Duck is epic. Lois hauls Lance and Lisa. Kylie Minogue is on this float. Wow, she's fully clothed, amazing. Do I hear Autotune? Why, probably. She's attractive and all, but Australia's pop princess is probably past her prime. I have yet to get one of her albums; perhaps next year.
Sanrio's Hello, Kitty float, augh. Whatever happened to Hell, Cthulu? The Japanese are insidious! I've never heard of Gloriana and I refuse to buy Gwyneth Paltrow as a country singer. She must be really hard up for work. Taylor Swift is only marginally more believable as a country act. Dear Leighton Meester: Stay in New York City playing a Knickerbocker woman of ill repute, because you're also not credible as a country music singer. P.S. Your single, heard on XM, hurt my ears to listen.
1053 - Jimmy Dean's breakfast products are good. Country acts, on the other hand, do not have fauxhawks. Good riddance to Shrek's float; didn't really care for that series.
1055 - Grants Pass High School from Oregon is going to play Fantasmic March. It didn't leave an impression, primarily because I can't hear them.
1057 Takashi Murakami is er, weird. Never heard of him or his designs. Hmm, it appears that someone named Keri Hilson is singing. Never heard of her, Princess Academy or anything they're talking about.
1059 - When you grow up, you can't be whatever you want to be. The sooner a child learns this, the better. They need to know this so they can adjust and plan accordingly.
1105 - Green Valley High School from Henderson, Nevada (or Oregon; people are making a lot of noise here) plays "Luck Be A Lady". Well, I totally agree. I'd rather have a lady than say, Kim Kardashian. They do a good job.
1107 - The Hess trailer has an F/A-22 on the back of it; I suppose that's a zero length launch system. Cool.
1115 - NYPD's Marching Band, yay. Oh, the theme from Star Blazers! Shut up, Lauer.
I'd rather hear Star Blazers than Spider-Man. I'm just not a fan of the friendly neighborhood webhead, other than where the 1980s cartoon was concerned, 'cause it had Firestar.
1117 - The imminent arrival of company, ahead of schedule, has severely disrupted liveblogging.
1118 - Yo Kanye, something something, and I'mma let you finish, but Kanye West hates white people! If I was a Macy's stockholder, I'd be irate that this illiterate simpleton was allowed in the parade. A group of human pool balls is more interesting than Kanye West. At least he was barely on.
1121 - Great, here's the suck-up to India. Moving right along.
1123 - Horton Hears a Who Cares! Now, here's the Kool-Aid Man, hooray! Oh yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I actually could use some Kool-Aid, a family member says, since apparently I'm rather sour.
1124 - Dora the Explorer doesn't belong in an American celebration; Thanksgiving has no significance to the Mexican peoples and this sort of multi-cultural pastiche offends on a variety of levels. Hasta luego, indeed! Perhaps Jan Brewer will have her arrested and deported.
1126 Why is the Pedro Molina Latin band here? I'm not enjoying their annoying Latin beat---let the Guatemalan government sponsor them in Guatemala. We don't march with American flags in Guatemalan holiday parades; I suppose it's too much to ask the same courtesy.
1127 - Yay, Hershey's kisses handbells. How old is this? Who cares, it's a great ad.
1129 - Hmm, people as penguins. I hate this arrangement, but hey, it's penguins.
1131 - The Build-a-Bear Workshop float is neat. I've never heard of whoever this teenager Victoria Justice is, so we'll focus on the float. It's got a nice set of design. Well, they're focusing on her basic R&B hand jive, which is annoying. I'd rather see the float. Freak the freak out. Aren't you cute.
1132 - Buzz Lightyear's float is waving his right hand, which isn't animated.
1137 - Oops, company cost me a look at whatever was on. OK, so Jessica Simpson. Is it some sort of cruelty to have her dancing with food? Heh. Even better, the Pillsbury Dough Boy is chasing her! (I kid, I kid; she's not overly rotund.)
1139 - The Macy's cornucopia is nice. Can't recall Betty Buckley. This float is the sort of thing we ought to be seeing more of.
1144 - NBC doesn't appear to have told me who this bunch of elves singing "Need a Little Christmas" are.
1148 - The Smurfs, yay! Those little Communist Belgians did apparently manage to give us zombie films before George Romero, so that's something.
1150 - Angelina Jolie sort of looks good. Joan Rivers on a snow queen float? Well, I'm sure her face is about as frozen in place as Arctic ice. Ditto her daughter, Melissa. Ha!
1152 - The Delta Airlines Central Park float is nice looking. Whoever Ann Hampton Callaway is, she's got a decent voice.
1155 - Ah, Virginia O'Hanlon. It looks like we're still honoring part of the legend. Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. The Macy's All-American Band is doing a nice job. I don't know that a remix of "When the Saints Come Marching In" is really appropriate, but whatever; Macy's is paying the bills.
1156 - Hooray, Macy's elves. I've lost the audio for the most part since relatives are now chattering at volume. I like the Macy's "Believe" sign; it's a nice backdrop.
1157 - Here's Santa Claus! I think I'd like to be one of the singers on Santa's float. Dear Macy's, call me. The Macy's belief meter may be full; can't tell from the angle that the NBC crew is set up.
Robin Hall and Amy Kule were responsible for this parade, and I suppose she's his replacement. At least NBC still says Merry Christmas at the end. Now, we've got the National Dog Show presented by Purina. Thanks to NBC for the broadcast and we'll be here again next year with the same blend of cultural snobbery, sarcasm and snark.
Posted by Country Pundit at November 25, 2010 09:08 AM